Helen Dunmore - the Costa winner on legacy and life

Before her death in June last year, Helen Dunmore wrote the article facing mortality and what we leave behind. Dunmore and her characters remind me how ordinary people live extraordinary lives. There are those who are recorded in history books. Then there are people like you and me. We are all unique and special. We have experiences and stories told in diaries, photoes and snippets over Sunday family dinners.

Her death from cancer also nudges us to take a step back and consider who we want to be and how we want to live our lives. What do we want to be remembered for? What if our time runs out when we turn 64?

A powerful article I read years ago written by a palliative nurse, Bronnie Ware, identified the top five regrets of the dying. It is essentially about following your dreams, investing in your happiness, family and friends. In a world which is about staying connected and the ease of travel, it is funny how little time we truly spend with those we love. We have all these time saving conveniences but less time to truly be happy and achieve what we really want in life. What is holding us back? How can we change this?

Many years ago, I attended a workshop taught by Helen Dunmore. She was a warm and kind woman who inspired me with her novel about mermaids and mermen. I love that she wrote for children and adults in different genres, and she was a poet too. Helen Dunmore - thank you for your great contribution.

Reflections for a happier and healthier you

We need to invest more in reflections. It's important to think about where we have been and what we have done. Then we can build on our fortunes and learn from our experiences.

When I think about last year, the year before that, 3 years or even 10 years ago, I am amazed and feel so lucky. There have been lots of downs but also lots of ups.

We get so caught up in the everyday, trying to squeeze everything in and do everything. We are always busy. There is a long to do list. It can feel overwhelming. How often do we take the time to say the most important thing on the list is me? What do I want? What do I need? Who am I?

We go on autopilot. We are creatures of habit. How often do we reflect on whether the autopilot and habits make sense for our evolving life and world?

This blog has helped me to develop my identity and writing voice. It may have even helped others as I have had thousands of viewers from around the world. That's pretty good since I don't promote it and very few friends or family know about it. This blog has been a collection of my reflections. It is the modern day diary which genuinely tries to seek and show truth.

This is why the new waves and trends involve mindfulness and other hybrids.

I would encourage you to spend some time reflecting and really invest in yourself to help you find even greater happiness and health.

Turn a bad day into a good one

This morning started off badly. I woke up thinking about all the things which were troubling me.

By lunch time, somehow my day had turned around. So what changed?

1. I did a meditation class. I learned about both self-compassion and compassion for others. 

2. I read about the importance of dreams. Paul McKenna's 'change your life in 7 days' is giving me a fresh perspective. 

3. I received messages from friends. Maybe it's the universe's way of saying you are not alone.

It's important to remember when you are feeling down that things change. You won't feel down forever. There are great things in your life. You can make yourself feel better, you can change your circumstances and the universe will send help too. Feel empowered, realise a bad day can become a good day and make it happen.

January - a time of new beginnings

January - it's the time for new beginnings. It might be you are starting or thinking about a new project, relationship or just about wanting to be happier.

In our busy lives, it is easy to be distracted by all sorts of fun frivolous amusements. The internet, social media, box sets, computer games and the list goes on. However if we write down our goals or reflect on our death bed, would we wish we spent more or less time on these things?

We also live with so much fear and anxiety these days. It's hard to remember the ebbs and flows of life which is never always down or up. There is constant change. How do we deal with these challenges? How can we make the best of what we have and achieve even more?

For 2018, I have started on my next project. A long haul flight facilitated this and prevented furthet procrastination. I've realised the way forward for me involves three things. These are reflection, planning and just working to make it happen.

We are now half way through January and before long it will be the beginning of February. It's a new year and a chance to make sure you don't look back on 2018 and wish you had done more. Good luck with your goals and plans. May you find success in your journey. Wishing you beauty, health and happiness.

2018 The Search for Beauty, Health and Happiness - New Year's Resolutions and Goals

As the new year approached and ended, we reflect on 2017 and consider how we can continue to find beauty, health and happiness in 2018. So 2017 wasn't the worst year ever, unless you're Harvey Weinstein. Nor is 2018 going to mean that you will necessarily top Prince Harry and have the wedding of the year. Crudely put, 2017 made winners and losers. Time will tell whether they can emulate their success or reverse their misfortunes. The road ahead for each of us remains unchartered. We all have our critics and supporters. At the end of the day, it is only how we feel about ourselves that matters. 

Many years ago, I decided that I should set out my goals. I realised that the human resource exercise I had to do annually for work should be something that I should apply to my personal life.

Over the years, I have realised some of these goals. I got my dream body, I was healthier than I've ever been, it felt like I was on the path to my dream job, I've fallen in and out of love, bought my almost dream home for now, discovered new hobbies which became life passions and travelled to some of the most amazing places. 

This process of setting out my resolutions and goals has helped me to prioritise and work out what I want and how I can be truly happy.

Broadly, my goals were categorised. These categories were as follows:

1. Family
2. Friends
3. Work
4. Finances
5. Travel
6. Beauty
7. Health
8. Happiness
9. Creativity
10. Large purchases

Writing down my goals helped me to remain focused. I also found that identifying short and long term goals meant that some of those pipe line dreams didn't get lost or forgotten.

My beauty, health and happiness goals for 2018 are all very much centred around one thing. I've also come to a realisation as to a new goal I have. The process of time and distance away from my everyday always reveals what the heart wants. Learning from the experiences and lives of others provides clarity and wisdom.

2017 was full of disappointments  but I did achieve much also. Hopefully this time next year, I can say I have been successful and it has not been as rough a road as this last year. I wish you every success in your search for beauty, health, happiness, 2018 resolutions and goals.