2017 - The Queen's Speech, the future and the home

The Queen's speech reflects the ups and downs of 2017. In her televised Christmas day speech, she mentions the London and Manchester bombings, Grenfell Towers, Prince Phillips' retirement, the Commonwealth and the home. It is reflective and seeks to unify us. The topic of home is what makes this speech remarkable and deserves further consideration. Throughout 2017, home has always been there, but it has been lost for some.

We have spent the year focusing on technology, Brexit and Trump. I wonder though whether we need to think more about the home, our values and how we treat people. What sort of city, country and world are we creating? How will future generations look back upon us? What will they consider to be our greatest achievements and failures? What have we done about poverty and homelessness?

Our journey takes us down many different roads. What road will we take in 2018? Do we see the glass as half empty or half full? What will we prioritise? What will we do for others versus what will we do for ourselves? The secrets to beauty, health and happiness is more than developing a glossy facade. It is more than a moment in time. The secrets to beauty, health and happiness might involve resolutions, but it will also involve perspiration and inspiration. We need to try to think outside of the box, dare to be and do something different.

The world continues to change and evolve. I marvel at the extinction of dinosaurs. They were unable to adapt and now they are a mythical creature for small children to wonder at, for our entertainment in Hollywood movies and one of many exhibits in our museums. As we relax at home on our phones, tablets and computers, let's pause and reflect on what will become of us. What comes next?

The Secret To Healing

What is the secret to healing? What do you do if life sucks? It could be grief, sadness, being bullied, relationship problems, depression or winter blues. All is bleak. You eat, sleep and exist.

Over the years, you face challenges. No one warned you how awful things would get. The older you become, the harder it is. 

Time heals. It is the lesson I have learnt. You need to take it one day at a time and small steps forward.

The top five things that can help with healing are:

1. Sleep and nutrition - these are key to physical and emotional healing. Invest in healthy eating and sleep at least 8 hours. Treat yourself to some of your favourite foods to get that feel good endorphin hit.

2. The analytical part of your brain also plays an important role in pulling you out of your funk. Learn about a topic that interests you. It helps to step away from the emotional rut into a logical black and white factual world.

3. Exercise helps to make you physically and emotionally stronger. Even if you start with just a little and then build on it.

4. Family, friends or even online forums alleviate that I am alone and no one understands me sense of helplessness.

5. Escapism gives you a breather from the burden and weight of whatever is causing you distress. For me, this involves colouring in pictures, box sets, reading teen fiction, you tube videos of I love Lucy and day dreaming.

It is hard. It does suck. There is no easy way. There are times when a good cry is needed. You need to accept the situation and these feelings will pass or fade eventually. Don't be too hard on yourself. Look for the positive and find your way out of the darkness.

If you need to, ask for help. There are people out there who can be there for you. It seems like it is a harsh and unkind selfish world at times. However, sometimes people will surprise you.

Good luck and take care of yourself.

Notes: ColorMe is a free app available on Google play. Now tv in the UK, Netflix and other providers offer a free trial period to watch tv box sets, try your local library for access to free books or electronic books and a search of I love Lucy on youtube provides free episodes. The teen fiction I read included Gossip Girl and the Carrie Diaries. 

The British Referendum - Brexit, the EU, Freedom of Movement and What's Next?

On 23 June 2016, Britain held a referendum on whether it should remain a part of the EU and they will now exit the European Union. The country and world were shocked by the result. The elite choked on their scones and English footballers were so distracted they suffered an embarrassing defeat to Iceland. The financial markets have predictably reacted to the economic and political uncertainty, but also to their assumption that the referendum result would be remain.

Simple Slow Cooked Osso Bucco in a Rich Red Wine Sauce

My slow cooked osso bucco today tasted so lovely that I had to share my recipe. Cooking can be simple, fun and taste even better than going to a Michelin star restaurant. There's no flour, no added salt and it's fairly low in fat and carbs too. It serves two people and was ready in less than 2.5 hours.

Ingredients:
2 tablespoons of olive oil
1 Onion
1 bay leaf
3 cloves of garlic (finely chopped)
340g of osso bucco
1 small beetroot chopped into strips
1 cup of shitake mushrooms
1 cube of chicken stock
1 teaspoon of paprika
1 teaspoon of cayenne pepper
1 tablespoon of worstershire sauce
1 cup of red wine
200 ml passatta
1/2 cup of green split peas
1/2 cup of quinoa
1 cup of green string beans
1/3 of a small red cabbage chopped
1 cup of broccoli

Method:
Heat the olive oil in a pan. Brown the onion, bay leaf, garlic, beetroot, shitake mushrooms and osso bucco in the olive oil.  Season with the worstershire sauce, cayenne pepper, paprika and chicken stock. Add the red wine, passatta and green split peas. Add enough water to cover all the ingredients. Cook on medium heat and when it is boiling, then reduce the heat to a simmer.

Top up the water when it gets low. I did this after maybe an hour. Stir occasionally. The quinoa and green string beans went in after 1.5 hours of slow cooking. The red cabbage and broccoli went in at the 1 hour and 55 minute mark. After 2 hours of slow cooking, it's ready to eat.

It's a recipe packed with lots of vitamins, minerals and antioxidants. This was so healthy and it was such a pleasure to eat. The sauce was a beautiful rich red colour and I didn't need to add any salt, pepper or other seasonings. You could sprinkle some grated parmesan cheese on top or add a dollop of ricotta if you want a richer texture and taste. A sprig of parsley or some basil or oregano will pretty it up if you want to garnish the dish. You could also serve this with bread, couscous, potatoes or any other carb hits you desire.

Like all stews, this will taste even better if you have leftovers for the next day because the flavours will fuse together.

I used passatta from a carton as I avoid canned items. The chicken stock was organic. The red wine was an Argentinian merlot. The split peas were not soaked beforehand. They were rinsed and washed. Remember to also wash your quinoa before adding it.

What if you don't have some of these ingredients? Simple substitutes include pork, lamb or beef for the osso bucco, frozen peas for the green split lentils, rice or potatoes for the quinoa, chili for cayenne pepper, carrots for the beetroot, vinegar or lemon for the worstershire sauce and any mushrooms for the shitake mushrooms. Any variations may affect the taste and texture, but you'll still have a good simple healthy stew.

Treat yourself tonight! I know you will enjoy this simple slow cooked osso bucco in a rich red wine sauce.

To Tinder or Not to Tinder

Tinder, the dating app that let's singletons swipe left or right to find someone, announced a few weeks ago that it is being listed on the stock exchange. It's the app that everyone has heard of and now its makers are looking to cash in on it. Tinder's success is it's simplicity . It takes the basic principle of online dating that people are interested in looks first then personality second. You look at a photo, if you're interested, you can see more photos and if they have a bio you can learn a bit more about them. You are interested if you swipe right. The next step is essentially just like being in a bar, you fancy each other and start talking.

So I began my tinder journey two weeks ago. I'd heard it had become more than just a hook up facilitator and some people managed to find someone to have a relationship with. So I installed the app. It took forever for it to load up and I must admit I nearly uninstalled and abandoned the experiment. My patience paid off. I began swiping and within hours I had guys chatting to me. A week later I had four dates! It was so easy, too easy it seems.

So I've tried a few online dating websites. How does Tinder compare? It is quick and easy. It is a good way to meet new people and get back into dating. The guys I've met were interesting. Three out of four guys were easy to talk to. The one guy who was a bit quiet, actually seemed really easy to chat to online. In person though, it was a long date and we didn't have much in common.

Tinder is essentially a superficial and not serious way of finding someone. It seems like quite a lot of people have been doing it for years and there is tinder fatigue of sorts. They go through the motions of meeting people but they aren't really looking for a relationship. Some guys are upfront. One guy I chatted to online was in the porn industry in an open relationship. No thank you! At least he was upfront about it.

It is definitely skewed towards women being able to get a lot of dates. Guys are getting dates too but now they are making girls pay or go dutch because they are getting more dates and so unable to afford to seriously show interest in any one girl. They basically make a point to tell me I have to get the next drink which I happily do, though one guy refused when I offered to get the next round. Chivalry is certainly an admirable quality, though it's understandable that chivalry may die with tinder's success.

I've noticed that being on tinder, your attitude changes. You think there are so many guys out there and you care a bit less. You aren't too sensitive about dating and don't take it personally. These are strangers who have simply swiped left or right. There's no etiquette and no niceties about it all.

I decided to do a clean up of my match page by unmatching a number of guys. I wondered if they would get a message that I had unmatched them and felt a bit guilty. Should I message them and apologise? I googled whether they get a message and there is no notification. I read that some guys swipe right in front of the television. They only bother after they have been matched! So I guess there is no expectation that because you have matched with someone, they genuinely took an interest in you after they looked at your photos and profile. It is a bit sad that the rules of engagement aren't even followed because people are becoming too lazy to even do that. So I unmatched all the guys that I had matched with but not had any messages from or we had to stop messaging each other. Tinder is going to change the way men and women interact. Our society is playing loose and fast with finding sincere and genuine relationships. I suppose there will be other apps and online dating forums for those that are looking for something other than keeping busy every night. Perhaps I'm being cynical. There may be others like me who are giving tinder a go and feel that it could be a way to find a happily ever after.

Can Tinder change your life? Tinder's marketing team suggest it will. Well at least I know what it's all about now. It will certainly be great for those behind the app who will financially benefit from the IPO. So back to swiping right and left. Happy tindering!