Saturday, November 21, 2020

Lockdown 2.0 - diary of a Londoner

Sunset - Thames River

Autumn sunshine makes me smile, but the evenings are chilly. The tide comes in & if I close my eyes it sounds like waves at a beach. I remember summer trips to Italy & that wonderful feeling of peace. 

Fuschia on my balcony

My little balcony garden has some late bloomers. They keep my spirits up. A little flower brings such joy. I am grateful to this plant, the seed which grew, the stranger who nurtured it, the nursery that sold it, the delivery company that brought it, the website that was made to sell it, the credit card that could be used to buy it & the life I have that I can enjoy it. 

I move pots around as not all spots are equal. The best place is the front corner which receives the most sun & rain. 

Llamas on the weekend

The weekend highlight is usually a long walk. I see llamas. It's such a treat. Anything out of the ordinary amazes me. These little escapes are like mini holidays. I forget for a while about 2020 & the world we live in. 

Am I trying to find the inner child in me & searching for that time when everything seemed simpler?

Blue skies in Autumn

When the skies are blue, there's a spring in my step. I know these moments are fleeting. If we could hold on to the blue skies somehow. I sing in my head when the grey clouds are rolling in - let the sun shine, let the sun shine. It's silly to think that singing this might hold off the rain for my walk. The rain comes & I think, well we need to accept the good & the bad. 

Animals socially distancing 

Everyone is respectful now & socially distances. I used to feel like I was maneuvering in traffic. I'd searched out alternative quiet routes & came out at less busy times. I don't worry so much about all of this any more. 

On twitter there's lots of covid deniers. I'm open to engaging with them but then some become nasty with insults rather than a discussion on views. I wonder if there is a mass rollout of the vaccine, what will happen to them? 

I've bought a new coat. It cheers me up. I don't know what I would have done without online shopping. When I put on something new, it gives me a buzz. 

Vegetables for dinner

This week I've been detoxing & exercising. I feel more energised. I eat lots of to manage feelings of hunger. At night I might have two bananas. The calorie counter tells me I'm consuming about 800 calories a day with my no oil, salt, sugar, bad carbs, dairy or meat diet. I've become accustomed to it. I can manage it for a few days. 


Kickboxing, weights, mini trampoline, HIIT, running on the spot & yoga takes up lots of time but it's better than sitting around eating all day. I used to do two workouts a day - these intense periods channel my frustrations & relieve my stress. I'm too tired to think too much about anything. 

Almond & hazelnut croissant 

The last few months, I've had too many cheat days, pasta & sweets. I'm back to being disciplined - the me that was happier. My clothes fit much better now. I'm glad I'm revisiting these old habits. 

For a few nights I had trouble sleeping. So I've tweaked my night time routine - bananas, cherries & a magnesium supplement. It's working! When I sleep through the night, my days are more productive & fulfilling.

Cleaning & laundry fill my weeks too. Messages from old friends and new are a welcome distraction. I'm doing zoom singing and zoom writing classes. Technology has meant connecting with creative people around the world & this pandemic has developed it further & faster. Throughout lockdown 1.0,  I was perpetually blocked & my creativity was stifled. It's a relief to be writing again. 

When I was doing charity work with children, they said it's important to give them your undivided attention. We so often don't give or receive that. I try to do that now for people of all ages - to hear what they have to say rather than to hear what I have to say. Writing is giving myself my undivided attention - to hear what I have to say, uninterrupted, not being judged & being kind to myself. 

Roses in Isle of Dogs Memorial Garden

They say we will have a vaccine soon. I know this time next year will be different. We just don't know how yet. Things will never be the same as before. Nor will they be the same as now.